Nitaiiiiii Babaaaaaaaaah!! Yeh Jaam Tere Naam!!!

My friend Nitai Utkarsh posted a comment about an earlier blog ( yes, I am aware that my blog count stands at the wonderfully even number of two. (BAD PUN!!) ) so I am making this effort to be rather more regular with the posts. Plus he believes I write well(or so he says), so, since flattery gets you everywhere, it gets Nitai a mention on my title! Yay for Nitai! Nitai for President! Errr..wrong country..Nitai for Prime Minister....hmmm...wrong locality(/religious sentiment ;-) )...Nitai for Scon!!! Got it right third time!!(One of those Mission Impossible scenes, no? Everyone was probably going going - Will he get it won't he...?)

Anyway, I am in a chatty mood tonight, I have many stories to tell, and I am trying to veer away from the off-colour ones, for no reason in particular, so lets see what interesting tale is going to tell itself tonight? For, tales do always seem to tell themselves...all they need is a little reflection on the part of the narrator and then the Captain Cook scene unfurls...Zarrrr se nikla jaata hai!!! Also, I believe in telling long rambling stories that make sense only to people who can muster the patience to listen to them. So in a way, a blog is The medium for me!!!

Right then, here we go! See now, the most interesting tales to a guy usually center around a girl or if the narrator is lucky, many girls. Many many many girls!!! Lots of girls! Lots and lots of them!! You know why? Because stories of how one makes a chump of oneself when in the company of the fairer(debatable) sex always draw good crowds. So tonight I relate the story of the first time I mustered up the courage to walk upto a girl and talk to her. Yes as many people might remember, the first post puberty chat with a girl is the one where you end up screwing your mental peace the most!!!

So here we have the great one (Me) falling base over apex for that really cute girl in my school and I decided to do something about it! So I walk up to her with a friend and she is standing near the FP stall with her friends and I am thinking - "Bloody Hell! Cant they dashed well just leave her alone for one second, for the love of God? Grrrr"

So all these interesting lines are going through my head, okay, - "If you would stand in front of a mirror with twelve roses, you would see thirteen beautiful things...Your dad must be an astronomer, You got stars in your eyes...." etc. etc....and as I walk up to her, it feels as if the world is moving in slow motion, and I can really feel my heart thumping harder with every step I am taking towards her, until I am sure "something bad will happen" (refer Asterix in Spain for details).

Uugaa Moogaa Gurrrrgleee Bloop Bliip, Blunlk??(Read these sounds as - Hi, I would really like your number, do you mind? or some words with the same general import!!) Well thats what it sounded to everyone around!! So my friend goes, hey your name is so-and-so, right? And she goes Yes, so he goes, Well my pal here would really like your number? So she goes Oh, ok, it is.... and I am nearly passing out from the nervous strain right now!!!

Anyway, joy was destined to be short lived...I carried over that damn stammer-bluster-blather into the phone conversation, ended up blurting what I knew best - one of those dirty jokes, which she never understood(, giving me a poor image of her under-developed intellect, by the way) and I am thinking all the time - Oh GAAAAAAAAAAAh!!!! what am I saying???????? And so that was the beginning of the end.....

I love these abrupt endings. It makes people feel they are being shortchanged, like watching the Matrix sequels. Fun Fun Fun!!!